I talk about fashion all the time, but we relatively seldom focus on the place where most of us spend a painful amount of time: the office. To be perfectly honest, my real work wardrobe falls somewhat short. I do have a collection of well-fitting and perfectly serviceable suits, a probably inappropriate number of pairs of pin-striped slacks, largely from Banana Republic, and half a dozen shells and silk blouses in different colors. Beyond that, though, what I have in my closet for the workday is a collection of relics of shopping trips ten years ago when it had not yet occurred to me that fashion existed and that there was a distinction between things that looked good on the hanger and things that looked good on me. (Oops.) I finally just threw away a pair of baggy burgundy pleat-front wool pants that were at least one size too large, and possibly two. Let’s never speak of those again.
As I slowly replace the horrifying with the stylish, however, I find myself fantasizing about the wardrobe I’d have if someone gave me Sarah Palin’s campaign wardrobe funding. That wardrobe? Ooh. You know the kind. The wardrobe of clothes so mind-bogglingly sharp and fashionable that the women keel over out of sheer envy and the men can’t decide whether to be turned on by your gorgeousness or intimidated by your air of competence and power. My imaginary work wardrobe involves a lot of Hugo Boss, a lot of Armani, and a judicious selection of terrific work wear from other designers. Filling my imaginary wardrobe is nearly as much fun as stepping up the real one.
Here’s what would be in my imaginary work closet for this season.